I have pulled Ten of Wands from the Ma’at Tarot as my heart's desire. The card is associated with the new moon in Capricorn. The card shows a woman gathering wood. The wood might be the burden of karmic debt. By associating the card with the new moon the card gets hopeful. The load of the woman is so heavy, she will not be able to carry it for long. If she lays down her burden, or burns the wood a new cycle begins, hence a new moon. I like the image (ah well, in the tiny version; she seems to struggle more in the big version).
My victim mentality (Card 1) is the inability to cope with my worries, lying awake from all the things I need to do. There is more what can keep me awake, but that is what keeps me awake right now. What I worry about is as all the not yet burnt branches on the back of the woman. They are heavy. Probably it is a karmic issue, my not being able to cope with all-the-things-I-must-do. I do not know. I do know thougt that I have it already for a long time now. It is indeed a heart felt wish to worry less and sleep better.
Funny is that I can read the card in another way as well, because I like the card. Then it is my karmic wish to be able to deal with a lot, to be really strong. I want to prove that over and over, just until I have learned the lesson that I am not strong, not as strong as I want to be. The high expectations of myself come back here (Card 2), one of the reasons that caused my victim mentality.
Both are true.