July 9th, 2006

Madonna del "Magnificat" (detail)

Meeting the Shadow yet Again

Today I got the opportunity to step out of a fixed mindset: for the third time a meeting with my shadow. 

My Card of the Day was: Eight of Swords from the Gilded Tarot. 


We, my family and me, went to Amsterdam, almost two hours by train. In the train I read a book about the enneagram. I knew the book, but had not read it for a long time. My enneagram-number is the 1, the number of the perfectionist.
My drive in life is: 'I must be perfect, everyone must be perfect, and everything must be perfect'.
My task in life is to embrace imperfection. I know that all to well. I suffer from being a perfectionist (sore muscles, hurting arms). In fact, I do not like being a perfectionist.

Today, re-reading the book, I read that the longing for perfection in itself is a good thing. I long for heaven on earth (just as The Magician). This helps me to step out of the fixed mindset of 'being bad as a perfectionist'. It is good to long for perfectionism. It had never occurred to me.