February 18th, 2008


Monday, Second Week of Lent

In the passage I have read today Jesus says to the disciples: Don’t you say, ‘There are yet four months until the harvest?’ Behold, I tell you, lift up your eyes, and look at the fields, that they are white for harvest already. My question is: What can I harvest in me but do I not see? Nowadays I try too evade depressing questions, but this one slipped through. The card that I have received is Four of Wands from the Gendron Tarot. 

A man and a woman are standing between wands. It looks if they are posing for a photo. Behind them is a big castle. Usually the card means celebrating, a rite the passage, a new phase in life and integration.

It was hard to look at the card, the light in it is dim, and the colors are murky, besides that the woman seems to have only one foot, or is standing really awkward. I find it difficult to interpret this card. My husband, whom I asked because I did not get the card, suggested that the card represents the moment that we are married for 12 and half year, which is arriving soon, which is reason for celebration. On another more superficial level: since a week I am able to make and upload a webpage. That is cause for celebration too – for me who could hardly type a word two years ago (…it is dangerous though, it involves much clicking with the mouse…). And I finished nearly all I need to prepare for this season and can start on the next.

Of course all these things are cause for celebration, but somehow I do not feel it on the inside right now. Therefore this card fits and my approach to it as well, my irritation about the dim light and its murkiness. This is literary a card of harvest, of a new phase and I just do not see it. Ain't I sad...