There are many figures and objects on the picture down here that shows Jesus riding on a donkey into Jerusalem. I wondered who or what I was in this procession of people that accompanies Jesus into Jerusalem so I made this my subject for a spread. This is what I did.
1.I made little index cards with the names of the figures and objects on it.
2.I shuffled them.
3.I pulled an index card with the question which object or figure symbolized me in this scene, thus, about my position and task in the procession.
4.After that I pulled a tarot card for what that object/figure represented in me (regarding to the subject: entry of Jesus into Jerusalem).
These were the choices on the index cards: the child on the arm of a mother, the mother of this child, the man before donkey with bowed head, the man who smiles to us behind the donkey, coat on the ground, woman smiling behind the donkey, man in tree, man upright with a palm branch behind the donkey, axe, palm branch, palm trees, flowers, donkey, little child on the forefront touching the donkey, man upright before the donkey waving and with a palm-branch, knife.
I pulled the index card of the man who stands upright before the donkey, waving, and with a palm branch in one hand. I was surprised by pulling him, but yes, that is me, stern, upright, brave, almost rigid, paving the way for Jesus to enter Jerusalem, marching on with him.
But I was surprised as well by the card that I pulled for what this figure represented in me. Here I am, this upright male, stern and rigid figure. But inside that figure is the lovely Marianne, to whom loves flows so naturally (as Maiden of Teacups), but here on the Four of Quills, she is sick by that same love.
In Sense and Sensibility, the book from which she comes, Marianne gets disappointed by the man she loved, she stops taking care of herself, being swamped by emotions, yes even wallowing in it and she then becomes gravely ill.
So here is the contrast. In the picture I stand upright, brave as I am, ready for this whole coming holy week of doing readings about Jesus and his road to Golgotha, but inside me there is a girl sick of too much passion and emotion, drained by doing all these intense readings of the last weeks, in dire need of rest and detachment.
Should not I do this to the extent that it was fun?
Time for a break.