pasen, resurrection

Lent, Friday, First Week, Fourth Week

In John (Joh 6:48-51) Jesus speaks of himself as bread which he will give for the life of the world.

The question for today, derived from these words is: What is the sacrifice that gives me life? Death from the Tarot of the Secret Forest is the card that came up. 


Very classical, to pull the Death card for this question, since Jesus his sacrifice was his life. Classical or not, I am not grasping it. Tomorrow another day.

Lent, Wednesday, Fourth Week

My card of today is an answer to the question: How am I bread that gives life? This question is inspired by words of Jesus in John in which he says that he is the bread that gives life. As bread Jesus shares his body. I received Two of Cups from the Fey Tarot. 


I am bread that gives life by showing who I am and sharing what I experience in my life. A thing I often forget; it is a lovely reminder.
heart from

Lent, Monday, Fourth Week (Second Entry)

Yesterday I pulled the Hanged Man from the Fey Tarot as an answer to the following question: How do I meet Jesus (in what appearance)? The question was inspired by the miracle at sea, in which the disciples are saved by Jesus. They see him coming in a huge storm, walking on the water and suddenly they are on shore. It is a very dramatic story.


The fish on the card is Jesus. Fish is what Jesus is called by the first Christian: Ichtus. ἰχθύς

This particular fish is red. In the fish - which is how Jesus appears to me -  I meet my anger. So, meeting Jesus, means seeing my anger. Not at all. I meet him in that that what is the most difficult to live with.

I do not mean this in a moral sense: “You may not be angry”. It is more in the sense of accepting it. That is belongs to me.


Lent, Tuesday, Fourth Week

How do I meet Jesus (in what appearance)? This question is inspired by the miracle at sea, in which the disciples are saved by Jesus. They see him coming, walking on the water. 


My card comes from the Fey Tarot, which is funny, because these are weird images. The card that I have pulled is the Hanged Man. I meet Jesus in the form of a fish, under sealevel.

I need to think about this. On to bed now.
heart from

Lent, Sunday, Third Week

After partying with die-hard Barthian theologians and spending the night at my father in law who is all into Steiner -worlds apart- I was wondering what card would came up to the question: “What is it that I do not see and do not hear?”

I have pulled the Maiden of Swords from the Arthurian Tarot. 


Depicted is Dindraine, who weaves a sword belt with her own hear and embroiders the scabbard of a sword which is meant as a sword of justice. The sword belt is a belt of mercy. The bearer of the sword will be girdled with mercy and humility.

It is mercy my eyes and ears are closed for. Probably most of all, mercy for myself, because that is where it all starts.
tiffany angel met lamp

Lent, Saturday, Third Week

My card of today is an answer to the question: Which word of God do I or keep (preserve)? To my surprise The Lord of Candlesticks (King of Wands) came up (Tarot of Jane Austen). 


Captain Frederick Wentworth is a character from Persuasion. He is determined, fiery and passionate. Determination and passion (fire) is what I keep as the word of God (I also need it).

I have pulled the King of Wands a few months ago to the question: “What will be new and healing on my religious/spiritual path?” 



This afternoon I had the uncanny experience again that I divided people into pairs with the help of colored stones they pulled from a bag, and that they were already sitting next to the person they were paired with through the stone. (the one with the same stone is one you pair with) .  

pink rose

Lent, Friday, Third Week

How can I be truly free? This question is derived from a saying of Jesus in John.
I pulled the Ace of Swords from the Victorian Romantic (not for the first time). 


I can be truly free by feeling the freedom to pick up the sword and make my decisions based on…based on what…on what I want. Hmmm..don’t know exactly how to put that in words.

This angel on this card looks a little bit like Caroline Bennett, on the Lovers card from the Jane Austen tarot, the card I pulled yesterday. Caroline, standing at the window, is light and lovely and airy as well, just as the angel on Ace of Swords. 

pink rose

Lent, Thursday, Third Week

I worked intense on a course for next year, and then on a difficult -but lovely- project of the church, and yesterday I felt sick. I have not pulled my cards for days. I miss the reflection on my inner processes. So I am glad I am able to make an entry today.

The card that I have pulled today is an answer to the question: What is the truth about me that liberates me? The question is based on a saying of Jesus in John about truth that liberates.

My card comes from the Tarot of Jane Austen: it is the Lovers. Depicted is Mr. Darcy, who looks to Elizabeth Bennett at the window. Caroline Bingley stands behind him, and wants his attention, but he does not see her. They are characters from Pride and Prejudice. 


Mr. Darcy needs to choose between the two woman on the card. What will liberate me is that I need to make a choice. What I need to be aware off in the choice, is my need to be liked. That makes it hard to say 'no', I do not do this, when someone wants something from me or wants to be with me. I need to be on the look out that this will not motivate my behavior and choices too much. I think that is the truth about me that liberates me. Knowing that truth, I can try to set out my own course – and hopefully the lovely Caroline Bingley at the open window with fresh air, will marry me.